I do not use the term "douche" except in the rare instances in which it is warranted. The term has a precise definition that reaches well beyond everyday unpleasantness, and it should not be thrown around indiscriminately. A person cannot be a true "douche" unless he is: (a.) aggressively arrogant about accomplishments that reasonable people do not take any particular pride in, and (b.) pathologically incompetent. One but not the other does not a douche make.
With this two-pronged test in mind, I believe I have discovered the Douchiest Place on Earth: The Axe Lounge. Apparently, the makers of Axe Body Spray do not want their douchebaggery to be limited to pathetically aspirational television ads, so now they have expanded into the world of pathetically aspirational nightclubs.
Well, that makes sense. After all, “Axe is all about the mating game, and the best place for a mating game is at a nightclub,” according to Axe's advertising consultant, Michael Heller (second from left above), who may or may not be fellating Mystery at this very moment.
So, if you happen to be in Southampton this summer, be sure to stop by this Den of a Thousand Douches. I'm sure it will be packed with beautiful women, not a bunch of rejects from The Pick-Up Artist.
Well, that makes sense. After all, “Axe is all about the mating game, and the best place for a mating game is at a nightclub,” according to Axe's advertising consultant, Michael Heller (second from left above), who may or may not be fellating Mystery at this very moment.
So, if you happen to be in Southampton this summer, be sure to stop by this Den of a Thousand Douches. I'm sure it will be packed with beautiful women, not a bunch of rejects from The Pick-Up Artist.
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